One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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