I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize