You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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