All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
