Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like death gave me a hand job
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize