"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
