your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
