Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
We left an ass print on the piano.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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