dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
