no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
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I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
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This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
how drunk are you?
Several
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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