their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
