he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
