I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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