that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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