On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Yo dont text me then not text me
I need help removing her.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
