Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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