THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
