Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i love accidental penises.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
