I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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