Porn is love you can see.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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