I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
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