It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
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She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
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Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize