No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
