Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
