Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Randomize