Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
