i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
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