Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
well you can't waste a boner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Randomize