Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Randomize