there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I got inside last night via doggy door
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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