But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
