we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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