What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Is her dick bigger than yours?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
