Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
