His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
21 Dirty Secrets From Bachelor/Bachelorette Parties That Have Destroyed Marriages
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend