well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
