Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
