I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
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Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
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And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
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