I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
