She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
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Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
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Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
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