that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
