Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
lets start a swedish sibling band together
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize
