i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
