Fuck appropriateness.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize