i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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