I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
