i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
