weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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