lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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