he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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