This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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